Choosing wholeness vs. brokenness

In the early 1980's, a woman asked me to help her with a back injury that caused non-stop pain, no matter what the doctors prescribed. It originated by a file cabinet falling on her back, so it was a workman's comp case.
Since she had tried everything and the pain was still there, I decided to use a Past-life Regression technique to go through the gamut of emotions she was still stuck into since the accident.
After the session, she sat up and looked dumbfounded. She yelled, "what did you do?"
I asked her to explain what she meant and she said that the pain was gone. But she was not happy, she was angry, very angry that she could not sue her employer anymore for the accident.
She demanded I put the pain back (?!?)  I told her I couldn't do that, and she stormed out.

On another occasion, a man I knew also had a work injury to his back that caused agonizing pain, taking pain pills to pass out for a few hours so he wouldn't feel anything. I offered to help and he said he wanted his former employer to pay for his negligence, so he wanted to stay in pain to get as much money as he could in the pending lawsuit. And after the Court hearing? He was used to being damaged by then, it became his identity, the victim that elicited pity from everybody.

A woman that came to me for a reading once, related how afraid she was of her mother. How old was her mother? Ninety years old. Her mother was abusive to her since she was a child, but now, in a wheel chair and sick, how much physical abuse can she inflict? None. But the daughter insisted in holding on to the fear, as if it was her identity. If she let go of the fear and empowered herself, who would she be? She didn't want to know.

The list goes on. I don't understand what people really want when they come to a Healer or Shaman for healing. Pity? Commiseration?
I don't believe they really want to let go of what is making them ill, as it is very useful to some to complain and feel helpless so someone will hurry to take care of them.
Sometimes, I presume, it comes from unmet needs in childhood, misdirected and twisted, so the reality becomes veiled and blurred.

There are, however, grateful people that are happy to shed the blocks in their lives so they can thrive.

As a Shaman, I don't deny healing to anyone that asks, but I cannot predict the outcome of my work. as It really depends on the willingness of the person asking for help to receive it.
Yes, the willingness to receive it.
Some people are stuck on "asking" for help, like a broken record that keeps repeating the same words until we push the needle forward out of the damaged groove.
Some people refuse to move out of the damaged groove, and I believe they don't want to be helped, they want to keep crying for help. Why? It is not my help they want, it is Mommy or Daddy that they want to come and fix what was broken a long time ago. It's very sad.
The truth is, we are all broken to some extent.
Some of us don't want to stay broken, we push forward out of the brokenness and accept the healing we seek. Those are my happy stories, to watch people transform and blossom, like raising birds from hatchlings, watching their wings grow and then one day take flight  and be free.

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