Truth

In the late 1980's, I enrolled in the Healing Light Center Church, run by Rosalyn Bruyere., in Glendale, CA.  As part of the curriculum, she believed that all healers are wounded healers, and that we needed to heal ourselves in order to heal others.
She encouraged all her students to experience Past-Life Regression therapy, and recommended her friend Dr. Morris Netherton.  So I heeded her advice and for a year and a half I embarked on the journey of self-discovery, first with Dr. Netherton himself, then with a certified practitioner of his, and lastly with a dear lady that became a beloved friend of mine.
I remember wondering why all my previous lives where so tragic.  A  wizard apprentice that knew what the wizard was doing to poison the King, an herbalist in the Middle Ages, viewed by the village as evil because she knew how to heal, a Medicine Woman in an Inca Village poisoned by a man that declared that if he could not have her she needed to die with all her people, and so on.
I asked if I ever had a happy life, and was transported to a Monastery in Tibet, where I was happy being One with life.
The common tread in all those past lives is that I never felt that I belonged anywhere. I was never accepted, I always knew what was going on and always ended up killed for what I was.
Fast forward to this life and it has always been very obvious I never fit in anywhere.
The need to fit in, be accepted and be loved created a behavior I cannot sustain anymore. It is not in the best interest to me, this planet and all life on this planet to allow others to view me as a threat to their illusory existence and then retreat. It has been very obvious to me that, my mere presence anywhere, mirrors  back to others what they are afraid of seeing in the mirror.

Subconsciously, everyone senses each other's energy and presence. How it translate into their awareness depends on what they are being triggered with by another's energy.

In the early 90's I met several gifted people in Sedona that were very impressed by my presence and proceeded to tell me things like, "Wow, you are pure Light, you sit at the right hand side of God", or, "When you were born, all the Gods in India rejoiced", or "Your hands feel like the hands of God touching me", etc.
My reaction? Rage. Why rage? Because my reality on this planet did not, and never did, match their visions. Yes, my life here was a struggle. It was filled with abuse, pain and suffering. In my mind, if I was such a thing they described to me, why did people shun me?

The Beings in my life explained to me this way:
"What you represent to others is what they are afraid of accepting themselves. Humans have accumulated so much density, their cries for freedom were buried deep a long time ago and when your Light shines in their presence, their pain is so great, they cannot themselves break the walls and join you in their magnificence. It is easier to reject your presence because they have come to believe as their truth, that they are small, powerless and must keep those walls up in order to survive. What you represent to them is what they have come to believe is not possible, much in the same way you did not believe it yourself when you were told the truth of who you are."

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